Monday, March 05, 2007

I've been in a funk lately. I don't know why, I just really don't feel like talking to people. My phone calls to my family have been farther between and when we do talk it's not for very long and I'm struggling to figure out what to say to them. I love my family and I love talking to them and spending time with them, but lately it just feels like I don't have anything to say. I guess it's normal to get into funks now and again though.

Eric and I went on a 5 mile walk yesterday. It was beautiful outside and I really enjoyed the time we spent walking. I got woke up this morning by a phone call from him. He locked his keys in his truck and I had to go on post to bring him the extra set. Oh, what would they do without us? lol

Eric and I want to have kids so bad. It's always been my dream to be a mom. I've always said, I don't know what I want to do, degree wise, but I've always known that I wanted to be a wife and mom. We've actually been trying to have kids from the beginning of our marriage, but have (obviously) been unsuccessful. (I really don't like talking about it, so don't ask me why I'm writing about it now, I think I just need to get it off my chest.) So, while Eric was gone a big motivation for me to lose weight was to try and help it be a little easier for us to have children. Well, I did lose the weight, but still no baby. I know it's all in God's timing and it will happen when He sees fit. We went to the dr the other day and everything's normal for the both of us, but she gave me some pills to try and help us out, and I pray that the Lord gives us a baby. I know He will, I just have to trust in the Lord with all my heart.

5 comments:

Andrea@Sgt and Mrs Hub said...

Oh, Michelle...that's really tough. It hurts when you want something so badly. It says in Proverbs (I think) "Hope deferred makes the heart sick." I have found this to be so true. While I haven't had this particular struggle, I have had my own unique set of struggles with those same feelings, it's like your whole body just hurts.

I'll pray that your heart will be very happy soon and that your arms will be full. You will be a wonderful mother for sure!

-Andrea

Glo said...

Hey Michelle,
Thanks for the "Happy Birthday".

The one thing I always wanted to be was a Mom.........Well don't give up girl. I was told I couldn't have any. I waited 3 yrs. Then I had my son.....5 1/2 yrs later had my daughter. So don't give up, just quit trying so hard relax and let God give that "Special Gift" to you in his time.

I know all about locking keys in car............Mike and I did it at the same time. He was at work and I was at the Grocery store.(I had my little dog with me she was in... I was out, my car was running.OOPS) He was trying to call me( and getting mad because he couldn't get me) and I was trying to call him.Also getting up set because I couldn't get him.)We were about 30 min apart......The Liberty police finally helped him out........Our police came to help me ,but try as hard as they could they couldn't get it.A guy who just happened to a old lock smith came to the store and saw me having trouble. Took the tool from the police and had it opened in 1 sec. I mean it was so fast,blink your eyes and you would have missed it. both Mike and I still laugh (17 yrs later)about this. Hope it made you laugh away the funks.

Love ya,
Glo

Courtney said...

Oh,Michelle you & eric will make great parents & I can't wait for that to happen for you guys. It will. I promise! Prayers are out & it will:)
Court♥

Charla said...

Hey girl, I'm so sorry you're feeling down right now I really hope you feel better soon. I can't imagine the heart-ache you must be feeling right now, but I truley believe that God will show you his plan in your life when the time is right. I'm sure you and Eric will be GREAT parents someday. You're still young and you have plenty of time to have a baby. Enjoy your time with Eric for now and try not to stress yourself out about not being pregnant yet, I know it will happen for you when the time is right! :)

As far as the guys go, I don't know what they'd do without us either..lol! I've lost track of the # of times Steve has called me saying he forgot something that he absolutely had to have and asking me to bring it to him. lol And they try to act like they don't need us..lol!!! YEAH RIGHT!!!! :)

Keep your chin up girl! I'll talk to ya soon!

Love ya,
Charla

kbug said...

I've always believed that things happen for a reason...and in some cases, don't happen for a reason. The problem is, the reason is not always clear.

Just a bit of encouragement for you, though. For 5 years after my dad returned from overseas after WWII, my parents were unable to have any children. About the time they decided it just wasn't going to happen...my mom finally got pregnant with my older sister. Seven years and 5 children later, they were beginning to wonder if she'd ever stop getting pregnant. So, don't give up hope, just relax and enjoy your time with Eric.

As for being in a funk, it happens to all of us at one time or another...even us old farts...lol. This too shall pass..... :)

Here's something that should make you laugh. Earlier this week, it was absolutely beautiful outside and I decided to eat at the little Mexican food place right around the corner that has an outdoor patio. I walked over to the restaurant...smiling at the people I passed, enjoying the sunshine, listening to the birds singing, humming to myself, and thanking the nice people in cars who let me jaywalk in front of them. When I arrived at the restaurant, a young woman smiled and seated me outside at a table in the sunshine. When I sat down, my jeans gapped open. I had forgotten to zip them when I stopped in the restroom before I left the office.....doh!!!