We got our pictures from the ball in today. I think it turned out pretty good.

We had a very good Christmas and it was so good having Eric home with me. We had to do our traveling home on Christmas, but we made it home in time to watch "It's a Wonderful Life" before we went to bed, which was our goal. My parents gave us a beautiful curio cabinet and me a jewelry armoire, and I love them. The only problem with them is that I can't use them until we get moved. I spent the morning packing and I got the spare room packed up (except the military gear). I'm so tired of moving, I just got unpacked here. I told my brother that I think I should do it for a living and make some money cause I'm getting pretty good at it! Oh well, once we get there we should have 2 years of not moving, that will be nice. Anyways, I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas.

We went to our ball and had fun. It was more fun then I thought it would be, thankfully. The commander really let loose and it was hilarious watching him and some of the others out there dancing. I'll post pictures later, when we get home. We're at my parents house right now, and my mom decided to go ahead and make Christmas dinner today so that we could all eat together. Our plans were to come here Friday and then go to Eric's moms house for Christmas Eve and Christmas day. We were going to eat with his family, but things changed. The Army decided that it would be a smart idea to give a 4 day weekend and make it Friday-Monday, making them go back to work on Tuesday. Which meant our plans had to change. We came down here on Thursday and we're still going to his mom's on Christmas Eve, but we have to make the drive back home Christmas day. That was a bummer, but ya gotta do what ya gotta do. Since we have to go home on Christmas day we weren't going to get a Christmas dinner, and my mom is such a sweetheart so she decided to change her plans and make dinner today instead of on Christmas. She said it's a lot better having dinner with everyone anyways, so it was no big deal. I know she's lying, considering she had to work, but it was so nice of her anyways.

Eric is still working on getting everything together so that he can go to ROTC. I'm trying really hard not to think about it because school starts on Jan 8. Which means that we have to be down in Oklahoma in 2 weeks. Which means I have to pack (which I have yet to start doing). Everything is going to be a rat race the next couple weeks, but I'm still trying not to think about it. It does me no good to stress about it, it's not going to make things go any faster (or slower, depending on how you look at it). Right now I'm just enjoying having him home for Christmas. Spending time with Eric and my family makes me happy.

This Christmas season has been wonderful and today we're doing our Christmas dinner and presents. I'm so thrilled. Lots of scheming has went into this Christmas though. Lots of lies being passed out in my family, ha! We all pitched in and got my sister a cell phone, but she thinks it's for my mom, but thinks my mom thinks it's for Eric. We got my brother an IPod and wrapped up a candle in one huge box (he has no patience, so we thought it would be funny to make him go through all this first) and then in a second huge box we wrapped about 5 different boxes he has to unwrap before he can have his real present. Then I bought Eric a gun, but he thinks it's for my dad, only I wanted it to be a surprise when he opened it, and since he knew which box it was in, I took it out of that box, put in tools to make it heavy wrapped it back up and wrapped the gun in a separate box, lol. We all pitched in and got my mom a digital camera (she took photography and loved it and has wanted a really nice camera ever since). It's been fun trying to keep all that straight, let me tell you, ha! ha! Anyways, I'm enjoying myself and having Eric home is just such a wonderful blessing all in it's own. I'll post pictures of the ball when I get home and I hope that everyone has a wonderful Christmas!

Eric graduated with his associates degree on Wednesday. I'm so proud of him. He worked so hard for it, and completed the last of it while he was overseas. He was determined and it definitely paid off for him. He even graduated with honors! I'm so extremely proud of him!

Then yesterday his unit disbanded so I went to the inactivation ceremony.

Nobody from his unit has been placed with other units though, so I'm not sure what they're going to be doing until they are. Tomorrow is my first military ball. So it's been a pretty busy week. I finished my classes for this semester and enrolled in Spring semester. At the end of next semester I'll graduate with my associates too. We started school at the same time but he was able to graduate ahead of me because he had military classes that went towards his degree. I'm not sure how well I'll like my next semester, I'm taking, Intro to Computers, Web Site Construction, Anatomy & Physiology for the Pre-Hospital Provider, and Intro to Political Science. That should keep me busy lol.

Things are going good around here. We've been busy with school and getting back into the swing of things together. It's been wonderful, and you can definitely tell there is a difference in our relationship and it's all for the best. We've grown in ways I never thought possible and it's all been a wonderful experience. Eric went back to work on Monday and I couldn't believe that his 30 days leave was over already. His unit is disbanding and they're having their demob ceremony on the 14. He graduates with his associates on the 13th, and we will probably be moving at the end of this month or the beginning of January. It all depends on whether everything goes good, and he has lots of work to do, but he will be going into the ROTC program in Oklahoma if everything goes as planned. It's a lot of work to get done in such a short amount of time, but we've been praying about it and I know that if it's the Lord's will it will happen. The down side is that he'll be getting out of the active Army and going into the Reserves until he's finished with his schooling. So, money will be tight, but again, if it's the Lord's will everything will work out how it's supposed to.

I'm so excited about Christmas this year. I got an early start, and have already finished up all my Christmas shopping. The only thing that is left is for Eric to finish shopping for me. Then we'll be completely done, which is rare because I usually leave it all for last minute. My Christmas cards are out and we've decorated the house. We still have to get a tree, but we're doing that this weekend. I love this Christmas and I am so thankful that we're spending it together. I don't think I've ever been more excited about a holiday then I am this year.

We got home today, and it is so good to be here. We had a wonderful time though, and I'm so thankful that we were able to take our vacation. Maui was wonderful, like I said in my previous post. It was such a romantic place to go and I couldn't have asked for a better honeymoon. We've been married for 4 years, but couldn't afford one before now, and it was well worth the wait. Here are some of the pictures from our trip. I took about a million, and I had a hard time narrowing it down, but at last I succeeded. We did one scheduled activity each full day we were there and the rest of the time we just went on our own just sightseeing. The first day was the luau, the second was snorkling, third was the helicopter ride and the last day was the submarine ride. The pictures of snorkling will have to come later because I have to scan those pictures on here. We also drove the Hana Hwy, it's 52 miles long but takes about 2 hrs one way driving because it has something like 623 turns and 52 one lane bridges. It's crazy, but has such beautiful views. The last day we were there we drove the top of Mt Haleakala and watched the sunset. Such magic. I was sad to see it end, but so happy we got to experience it together. It was just perfect for the ending of such a long year.

We made it back Tuesday morning. We had an amazing time in Maui. It's so beautiful there and it was just what the dr ordered after such a long year. We're at my parent's house right now, so I can't put pictures up yet, but we'll be going home next week and I'll update with pictures. It was such a good vacation/honeymoon and I'm so thankful that Eric's home with me again. Thanksgiving went well too, we went to my aunt's house and stayed a couple night's where they live. The only bad thing about that was we stayed with one of my cousin's and his wife is such a witch. She's one of those people who think they're better than everybody. When we came over she didn't say hi or anything then went to bed about 5 minutes later. The next morning she was banging pots and pans around (we took it as a hint she wanted us up and gone, so we happily left) later yesterday my sister realized that she had forgot something at their house so she called to see if she could come get it. The lady didn't answer the phone, but called back a few minutes later and said we left some stuff and needed to come get it, she was getting in the shower. Apparently she couldn't wait 5 minutes while we came and got it. Eric took my sister to get it and she had put it in a sack outside their door. Geez I'd like to slap her attitude right out of her. We usually stay at another one of my cousin's houses but his wife was having her family over so we couldn't this time. My parent's said that next time we're up there if we have to stay at the one's we stayed at this time, we'll just rent a motel room and stay there because that's ridiculous to be treated that way. Anyways, other than that everything went very well and we enjoyed ourselves. I'll write more about our time in Maui when I post pictures next week. I hope everything is going well with everyone else and I hope that you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

The new song on here is one we played at our wedding, "Whatever It Takes" by Kellie Coffey. I love this song and I think it's a perfect fit even more today than the day we got married.

Leave is going good. We're at his families right now. We spent 5 days with mine and then came up here. We're here until Wednesday morning and then we're off to Hawaii. I'm so excited. Things are great with Eric and me. It's wonderful getting to spend time together. We went to an art museum yesterday, which was pretty fun. We've been staying with family the whole time, which kind of sucks, but we still go off and do our own thing alone. I'm ready for our trip, so we won't have to worry about family for a while. I love them to death, but I don't want to have to worry about them for a while. Anyways, I won't be back on here until we're back, but I hope everything is going good for everyone else. Have a great next couple of weeks!!!

Charla told me that her's and Courtney's men are home! I'm so happy to hear that. Congratulations on surviving the deployment!!!! You ladies are very strong and I'm so proud of both of you. Enjoy yourselves!!!!!!!! Thank you both and thank Matt and Steve for their service to our country!

Today marks a week since Eric came home. I'm so happy he's home. We've been having such a wonderful time together, just like he never left. The only difference between then and now is that we're closer than ever and we have grown so much in each other over the past year. I know that our relationship is stronger and more wonderful than before. Saturday he starts leave, so we'll be going to Oklahoma for a while, then to Hawaii. I think we're going to spend Thanksgiving with my family this year. Better food there than at his, ha!!!! It was his choice too. Of course then we'll be at his families for Christmas. I'm really looking forward to holidays this year. I dreaded them last year, but they've never looked better than they do this year. We bought new furniture for the apartment. It looks so good. The last of it was delivered today. I also got Eric a Line X bedliner for his truck, which he loves. We have a ball in December for his unit and I got my dress yesterday. I also got my rings back from the jewelers yesterday. I had to put them in to get sized, and I went down 2 sizes! I was excited about that. Everything is going good, but in case I don't update for a while, since we will be on vacation, I hope everything is going good with everything else. Courtney and Charla, enjoy your husbands, and congratulations on very soon homecoming!!!!!!!!

I would like to thank all the blogger girls who helped me through the year of deployment. I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for the support you gave me during the rough times and for understanding during the bad days. I can't say now that it's over that looking back it went by faster then I thought it was. I guess some people can, but I'm not one of them. It went slow, no doubt about it, but thanks to the many friends I made through blogger, it wasn't as rough as it could have been. I made it through with relatively few break downs and without making myself and everyone around me miserable. I'm stronger because of this deployment and I know that both Eric and myself have grown because of it. For that, I'm extremely grateful. I appreciate every word of comfort and for all the support from all of you. Thank you all so very much!!!

The last couple days have flown by since Eric's home again. He had 48 hrs off, but had to go back to work today. Thankfully the next couple weeks are just half days and then he gets his 30 days block leave. We're planning on going to Hawaii for a few of those days. Then of course spend time with the rest of the family. His mom and sister were here until yesterday. It kind of irritated me because of course I wanted to spend alone time with him and they were always there. Oh well, at least we got most of the day yesterday alone. We went furniture shopping yesterday. We bought a new couch, table/chairs, coffee table, end table, and dresser. We also bought from three different furniture stores and so we have deliveries coming today, tomorrow and Monday, lol. I think Eric wants to drive down to Oklahoma tomorrow so he can watch the OU game with dad. He told me a while back he really missed that, so I think that's what we'll do this weekend. It's so wonderful having him home. It's amazing how much you really realize that you missed their company once their home. I knew I missed him, of course, but I don't think it really hit me until he got here. My friend is so great too, she stayed up until 3 a.m. the day he came in just so she could tape the ceremony for us. She hadn't even met Eric until that point. I'm so grateful she did that. Here are a couple pictures of when he came home and was released. After they came in (which took forever and I was really irritated when we had to watch that stupid video while they were standing right outside the door!) it didn't take long for the guy to say what he had to say and then release them. Although he said that there were 3 other people who wanted to say something and I about committed murder, lol. But apparently he was either kidding or didn't know what he was doing, because there wasn't, Thank God!!! So, I bolted towards Eric and the first picture is the first hug we had. Also, my weight loss the day Eric got home was a total of 75 lbs. I've lost 11 inches in my waist, and my rings keep flying off my fingers. I hadn't sent pictures of myself to Eric in about two months, I told him the end result would be a surprise. I think he was very pleasantly surprised. After he hugged me he held me out at arms length and said, "Wow." lol... I took that as a compliment. I'm not sure if you can tell in the pictures, but that's my new haircut too.

He's home! Safe and sound!!!!!! After sitting at the gym for about 2 hrs and having to watch a video that they made for the new Army slogan "Army Strong" they finally came in. They saved the stupid video until they were outside. I was so irritated. They couldn't have showed it to us the last 2 hrs we were there? Geez... Oh Well, the Army has their own way of doing things and most the time it doesn't make much sense. It doesn't matter now though. He's home and it's so wonderful. Aahhh.... I finally get to have a good night's sleep, I can't wait.

My MIL and SIL came up yesterday. I'm going crazy here with them by myself. Nobody else is here to take up the slack. My friend was over most the day with me yesterday and she stayed for quite a while after they got here. I was so thankful that she was here to occasionally slip in the conversation and give me a break. I told my mom I thank God for her! lol...It's the truth. She's been a blessing. Of course I can't say when Eric will be home, but I can say, the next time I post he will be here! I'm so excited. Although my inlaws are taking some of the joy away from me because my nerves are being tested very badly with them here. I love them, don't get me wrong, but they sure do know how to test me. My MIL spent about 3 hrs yesterday talking about her crocheting and then got onto me about leaving the lights and TV on. Um...last I checked she didn't pay the electric bill! Ugh...well I just keep telling myself, keep your eyes on the end, it's all worth it! I can take my inlaws, but in moderation. The past 24 hrs have been so stressful! I was telling my friend about them before they got here. I don't think she quite believed me until she seen it with her own eyes. I talked to her today and she said she just kept thinking, "how do you stand it?" lol... Constant talking and droning on and on about nothing. AAAAHHHHHH. Ok, that's my vent for today, actually that's the third time I've vented that today, lol. Anyways, I'll post later, and my husband will be home!!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I had another FRG meeting today. We mainly talked about the ball we're going to have around Christmas time. We did, of course, talk about the homecoming. They narrowed the day down a little for us, which is super exciting. Of course because of OPSEC I can't say anything about that. I guess the most I can say is soon, very soon. I'm just ready for the whole thing to be over. I'm tired of waiting. Nights are longer than ever and sleep doesn't come easy. All my days of having something to look forward to are over, so the next date to look for is his actual homecoming. I feel like Courtney on the updating thing though. I just feel like I'm saying the same things over and over again. I can't give out specifics and there's nothing else to talk about. Except, classes started yesterday. I'm trying to keep busy with that. Our anniversary wasn't as hard as I expected it to be, thanks to my friend. She came and got me and we went out to eat and went shopping. Then she spent the rest of the day here at my place. She's been so helpful. I'm so thankful that God sent her my way. It's nice to have someone to talk to who understands and who will help pass time away. I told her that my neighbors probably think I'm the one who flew over the coo coo's nest. lol...Sometimes I think I'm going crazy.

Sorry it's been a while. I haven't been busy or anything, it's just been kind of depressing the past week. I know it's getting time for him to come home, but I don't think time could go any slower. Although I thought that during the bulk of the deployment too and low and behold it IS able to go slower. I've been hanging out with my friend and trying to keep occupied, but still time goes by so slow. I didn't go make signs with the FRG yesterday. I thought a few weeks ago when I was still in Oklahoma that I would be handy and change the windshield wipers on the truck. Well, I couldn't, for the life of me, get the stupid things to lock on. I asked my dad to look at it before I left, but I asked him at night and he forgot. So, they are just kind of sitting on the arm, and not actually operable without flying off if I turned them on. Well it rained all day yesterday, so I wasn't about to drive the 30 minutes to the place without wipers. Oh well. Tomorrow is our 4 year anniversary. At least he'll be home soon, if time would go by at a normal speed that is.

I went to an FRG meeting. It was the first meeting (besides the redeployment briefing) that I've been to since Eric left. The only reason I went was because they were going to talk about the homecoming ceremony and I wanted to know what was going on. The time frame has changed a little. They pushed them back by three days, no big deal. I was already expecting that time frame anyways, since Eric and I have talked about the different things we've heard, so no real change. Other than that, they didn't really say much. Everything is still so tentative. They're not even sure where they're going to have the ceremony at yet. Of course I wish they knew more, so family could make plans and such, but there's nothing anybody can do, so no use in worrying about it all. They did talk about the ball they're going to have in December. It will be my first military ball, so I'm kind of looking forward to it. I think it will be neat to get all dressed up with Eric and go for a night out. Right now though, I'm just looking forward to him coming home!

I’ve kind of broken up the time until he comes home with stupid stuff. For instance, on Oct 1 I broke it down by the 3rd I was getting a haircut, today was the FRG meeting, the 12th is our anniversary (celebrating 4 wonderful years of marriage to my loving husband) and so on and so forth, little dates to help make it not seem so far away. I was telling my friend that I’m sure that to civilian people, military wives seem like nuts jobs with all the little things we do to break up the time we’re away from our guys. Oh well, we all do what we have to do to get through, that’s what’s important. They are getting together next week and the week after to make signs and such for the homecoming and I think I'll go, if for no other reason then to add more stuff to break up the time until he's home.

I got two compliments at the meeting too. The first was on my haircut. It was actually my third haircut in the past two weeks, ha! I just couldn’t get it how I like it until this time. I love it! It’s not short or anything, but it has lots of layers. Then another lady complimented me on my weight loss. She told me I was looking really good, which made me feel pretty good. I have lost 70.5 lbs now! My mom said that another 15 lbs and she thinks I'll be just right. My goal is another 25 lbs though, but I'll just have to wait and see what looks best when I get down some more. Not much more to go though, so that's wonderful! I'm pretty proud of myself. I told Eric the other day, no more pictures of me until he gets home. I want the end result to be a surprise. I can't wait until he's home!!! Lord I hope the next few weeks go by quickly!

I did myself a little dance today while turning the page on the calendar over. Why? Because I can officially say, "I'LL SEE MY HUSBAND THIS MONTH!!!!" I thought September would never end, but it finally did. YAY!!!! Now, just a few more weeks and it'll all be over.

I had a bit of a break down today, but I guess it's to be expected. The shorter the time gets the farther away it seems. It just seems that the end is right there, but I just can't get there. I'm thinking it wasn't the best idea in the world to move back up here and be alone. I did, however, make a friend but she's out of town right now, and I'm not sure when she'll be home. When she's home she helps fill my days up. Her husband just deployed last month, so she's just beginning the journey, although this is his second deployment.

I guess the only thing to do is keep on keepin' on. The Lord has got me through this much of it, He'll give me the strength for the rest.

I'm back in Kansas again. I had a hard time deciding if I should go ahead and come back up here or if I should stay down in Oklahoma for a while longer, but obviously coming back home won out. I'm glad I did too now. When I got home there was a note on my door that said my stationary bike would be delivered tomorrow. YAY! My parents gave me the money for it, they said I was doing a really good job, and to keep up the hard work. They're so sweet. The next time I see my family, Eric will be here. Man, it sounds so good to hear that, and to see it. They're going to try and come up, but they're not sure yet if they'll be able to. It's hard to make plans when you can't get a date nailed down. Eric's mom and sister will probably be up here, but his mom's a little anal when it comes to her work. When I called to tell her the time frame she was looking at the calendar trying to figure out if it would fall after she does payroll. Apparently the world would fall apart if she taught the other lady that works in the office how to do it for one week. Oh well, that's one of the many things you have to get used to when it comes to my MIL.

I guess it's because the time is coming up soon, but I've been very on edge the past few days. My sister was getting the brunt end of the deal yesterday. She seemed to be being very rude, and I snapped at her a couple times. When I apologized she said, "Geez, are you pregnant?" lol... Unfortunately, no. I just wish this time would get over with already.

I wonder if my neighbors wonder if I'll ever quit bringing boxes into this place. I swear it's like we have the stash of never-ending crap. At least most of the boxes this time was from stuff Eric sent home! YAY! It's kind of hard to find places to put it all though when you live in a two bedroom apartment. Gotta love the 700 pairs of issued boots! Maybe they do that because back in the day the soldiers had to wear their's for so long that they just ended up walking right out of them, so they don't want that to happen nowadays, so they issue as many as possible. Ok, I'm rambling, that's what happens when you drive 7 1/2 hrs ALONE from Oklahoma to Kansas, with nothing in between but some wheat fields. You go insane.

I'm so very tired, so if this post doesn't make sense, I'm so sorry.

When I got to my parent's house on Thursday I had two surprises that Eric sent me. In the first package I found a Nicholas Sparks book, "At First Sight." I love Nicholas Sparks' books and I love the movie "At First Sight," which is, of course, based off his novel. He also wrote "The Notebook." So sweet! The second package just made my heart melt even more. I opened it and in it was a note that said, "I seen this and thought of you. I love you always and forever, Eric ********." lol...First of all, he signs everything to me with his first and last name. That always cracks me up. Anyways, in that package was the movie, "Fried Green Tomatoes." Oh my gosh, I LOVE this movie. It's one of my favorites and Eric knows that I love it and he bought it for me. How sweet!!! I have also received two packages from him of his stuff! YAY!!! There is one more box on the way and it's the guitar that one of his old roommates gave him.

All three of his roommates have left to go home. He was in a room all by himself for the remainder of the time there. Until one female NCO decided she wanted a room all to herself so they kicked him out and made him move in with two new people that he's never met for the remainder of his stay. Anyways, I was a little aggrivated about that, but hey, it's the Army way.

Yesterday I got up and talked to Eric, then I took my sister and her friend to Oklahoma City to the mall. We left at 10 a.m. and was home by 5 p.m. It was an alright trip, but I was tired after that. Then I got home and my brother's exgf was wanting me to go to a girls night with her. I said alright because she said she wasn't staying the night, just going over there for a while. We went over there and had some fun just sitting around talking and laughing about the good ole days. There was just 5 of us, and 4 of us used to be pretty good friends back in the day, so it was good to catch up. Well, we stayed longer than I expected. I actually just got home, and have had no sleep since I woke up at 8 yesterday morning. I can't wait to climb into bed and catch some zzzz's but Eric's going to call this morning and I know if I don't wait up I won't wake up when he calls, or I'll be falling asleep while he's trying to talk to me, lol. I defintely don't want that, because I treasure every second I have talking to him. I've neglected my homework this week and if I don't get it done today I will be behind, but that's about 10000 on my list of things to do, so I don't actually care about that at this particular time.

We had our redeployment briefing today, which was really nice. The meeting itself sucked, but just the thought that they are coming home soon is nice. I'm so excited that soon I will be back with my husband, where we belong. I have no idea what to do for his homecoming. I'm really at a loss for creative ideas. I just want my husband home. I just want next month to be here and over with. Our FRG leader asked me today if I was excited about them coming home soon. I said "Yeah." She said, "You don't look like it." How am I supposed to look? I'm not going to jump up and down at a redeployment briefing when we still have some time left and there was no mention of an exact date and especially with people who I have had basically no contact with over the past year. My husband, the love of my life, my best friend, is coming home after being away for a year. Of course I'm excited. Put him in front of me and then see how excited I am, lol. I'm going back to Oklahoma tomorrow. I'm dreading the trip, but tomorrow is my sister's 16th birthday. I can't believe that she's going to be 16. I absolutely HATE that! She's not supposed to be that big, she's just supposed to be a little girl forever. Is that too much to ask?

Well, I have neglected "Gettin' Fit Friday" for a few weeks, but most of it was due to situations that were not in my control. Anyways, hopefully now I can get back to updating about that. I have still been doing good with my exercises. I have lost 65 1/2 pounds so far. I've been having to improvise as far as working out, since I don't have my treadmill or the stationary bike at the moment. I've just been using my "Billy Bands" for resistance and doing my own thing. The bike I was using is my dad's and since I moved I have to get my own. My parents would have given me the one of his but it was a birthday present, lol. They did give me money to get a new one, they said they were very proud of me and it was my present for doing so well. They certainly are very sweet people.

I came up to Kansas on Wednesday. After I got the news that we're having the redeployment briefing, I decided to come up and get this apartment done. I spent all evening on Wednesday working on this place, but I didn't yesterday. I met another military wife on one of the military wife groups I'm in, and we hung out yesterday, she's such a sweetheart too. Her husband just left to go overseas a couple weeks ago. Today, though, I have spent all day working on this place. I got up and finished my history homework real fast and the rest of the time I've been going and going trying to get all the boxes unpacked. I swear I think I've walked about 10 miles just around this place. I have made some really good progress though. I have unpacked EVERY box, except 2! Aaahhhh....time to sit and rest. Where does all the crap come from? I swear it didn't seem like we had this much stuff when we packed it up. It didn't seem like it when it was out in the other apartment either, but now, it seems like it in a big way. Stuff all over. No place to put it. What do I do? That's why man made the trash can! lol... I'm going back to Oklahoma next week for my sister's birthday, but so far staying up here hasn't been too bad. I'm just so ready for my husband to be here with me again. Right where he's supposed to be. I can't specify a date that Eric will be home, the closest I can say is I'll see him next month, but man it feels so good to say that! He said he was looking at the calendar yesterday and got excited seeing how many days we're down to. Lord help the time to go by quickly!

I am so very excited right now. I just got a call from my POC, and she said they have scheduled a redeployment briefing for next week. She also gave me a time frame for when they will be home, which is so exciting because it's a little before what we last heard!!! I'm so happy, I just want to do a little dance. So, my plans of staying here until my sister's birthday have changed, but it's well worth it. Although, she might be a little upset because I'm going to be late for her birthday party. Oh, well, she'll get over it. I'm so super excited right now!!!! YAY!!! The end is finally in sight and it's almost time to be with my husband again!!!!!

I got back from Kansas today. My grandpa's funeral was yesterday, it went as good as a funeral can go. They had a family dinner at 11:30 followed by a flower service (which, by the way, is a bit of a waste of time) and then the funeral started at 2. A lady sang "Wind Beneath My Wings" and then the lady that sang at my grandma's funeral sang "I Saw the Light" and "Old Rugged Cross." Grandpa always liked the ladies voice when she sang at Grandma's funeral, so they got her to sing for his too. When we went out to the cemetery, they had the military do the 21-gun salute, taps and the flag folding honors. That was really touching. Eric suggested to me that they ask the military to do the honors, and when I told my family they really liked the idea. It was so neat watching how precise and serious they take it. It filled me with pride knowing that Grandpa Ed fought for this country. He never talked much about his service, but he didn't have to. We all knew what he did for our country, and I think that's what makes the best soldier, doing what they have to do without wanting the recognition that they deserve. He went out with the highest honors though, and that is exactly what he deserved. The military gave the flag to my uncle, the oldest son, and he gave it to my dad. I told him I would buy him a display case to put it in. It was so weird going up there without him there. His wife sold his house a couple months ago and it was really odd not being able to over there to his house this time. My heart breaks for my dad and his brother and sisters. Dad isn't taking this very well, and he told me the other day, "It sure hurts to not have a mom or a dad anymore." He'll be fine, and time will help him deal, but I just wish I could help.

My parents were going up to Kansas yesterday to be with Grandpa and I was planning on staying home. The dr and nurses told everyone up there that they thought Grandpa was holding on for dad, so they decided to go up there. They were just supposed to go up yesterday, come home today and then go back tomorrow. I planned on just going back up with them when they went, but we got word yesterday that the dr gave him less than 24 hrs to live, so I decided to go up with them. My brother was going to take his vehicle later in the day, so I went with my mom, dad, and sister. When we got to the town where my aunt lives (an hr from where we were going) I decided to get out and wait on my brother, cause he was on his way up and only about 45 mins behind us. Mom, Dad and Meg went ahead of us and when we were about 30 mins from where we were going we got a call from Meg. Grandpa passed away. We went as fast as we could to get there and it seemed like an eternity. My brother said that he bet Grandma was up in Heaven singing a tune. When we got there my Aunt Dixie said that she was with Grandpa when he passed. It was right before my parents got there and she said she was outside and the nurse came and got her. She ran in and she said she grabbed his hand and said, "Dad, I love you and Tommy's here." (Tommy is my dad.) She said as soon as she said that he took his last breath. His funeral is Saturday at 2. Since he was in Korea, Eric suggested that they have a military funeral for him, and I told them that. Everyone really liked the idea, so they're sending him out with the honor he deserves. It's so sad to think that Grandpa isn't with us anymore. We won't ever be able to go up and see him at his house. There will definitely be a void in all of us. Nothing or nobody can every take the place of that guy. He's one of a kind. I'm just glad that he's not suffering anymore. The last couple years have been torture for the guy, losing his mind and knowing that he's losing it. The last two months have been agonizing for him, and the past two weeks I'm sure have been hell. He's up in Heaven with Jesus now, singing and laughing and being with the love of his life. For that, I am extremely grateful. I just wish it didn't hurt so much, I wish Eric was here for me to lean on.

This weekend has to go down as one of the worst in the history of my weekends. Friday I started to load the truck up with our things. Right away I climbed up in the bed of the truck, underneath the carport and hit my head on the metal bar that runs across the bottom of it. I laughed that off, and moved on. We loaded the treadmill, with my brother's help. He complained the whole time (that's the only thing we asked him to load). Then after it was loaded I decided it was taking up too much room and I wouldn't have enough room for everything else I had to take, so mom said I could keep it there and just get it when Eric got home. So, we waited on my brother to leave (so he wouldn't gripe about having to load it for nothing) before we unloaded it. Then we loaded the dresser and desk. The desk took up so much room and I hate that desk anyways (why I bought a black desk and all glass table tops when we picked out our furniture I'm still trying to figure out) , so after trying to load all the boxes around the desk (and hitting my head on that bar 3 more times) I got frustrated. Mom kept asking me, "Do you really need to take that?" I kept telling her that this is the last time I'm going to have any help, I don't want to have a bunch of crap to haul all by myself next time. I got mad and got in the back of the truck with a hammer and tore the desk down, in the process I hit my head yet another time on the bar and then hit it with the hammer. I was really frustrated but beating the desk down did help lol. I got almost everything loaded, minus a couple boxes I'll have to bring up here next time, and got the tarp on. That was the end of Friday.

Saturday was pretty uneventful, my sister and I made the trip up here. It was the longest this trip has every seemed to take. It was horribly long. It rained the whole way. The tarp started to come loose once, but I got out and fixed it and that's the most trouble it gave me. We got up here, unloaded, stayed up till 12:30 trying to get a few things done and putting my file cabinet together, that ended Saturday.

Sunday has stunk all the way around. First, I took my sister to the mall and when we were leaving my mom called and told me that Grandpa's breathing is really bad. She said that the dr and nurses told them that when a person loves their family as much as he does that sometimes they will hold on just for them. Well, I guess yesterday all of his kids (my dad included) told him that it's ok to leave and go be with Jesus. So mom wanted my sister and me to call and talk to grandpa and let him know that it's ok, since we have a very close relationship. When I got back home I called the hospital and had my aunt hold the phone to his ear. I told him that it's ok to let go and go be with Jesus, that he's done everything he can for his family and that we love him. Of course he didn't say anything because he's not coherent anymore, but it was still a hard conversation to have. After hanging up there I decided to try and get a few things accomplished around the house. I will say that I'm proud of myself, I put together the new, much improved, desk (with some help from my sister) without any incident or without getting frustrated. As soon as I got it together, I put my computer up and was hooking up my printer. My parents bought me a printer for Christmas last year, a really nice one. I love that printer. It has the place to stick the memory card for my digital camera in it, making it super easy to make prints off, it has the scanner, copier, ect. I love it. Well, as I was plugging it in, it falls off the stupid desk, and shattered. Great. I called my mom upset, she told me not to worry about it. I shook that off and went to Wal Mart to do some grocery shopping. We went in, got everything I needed, paid, come out and unload them into the truck. My sister went to put the cart away, I push the button to unlock the driver's side, put my purse in the passenger side and shut the door. I walk around to the driver's side, and low and behold, the door is locked. I pushed it the wrong way. AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!! I called my mom again, lol. She asked dad what I should do, he said go ask the customer service people if they have a way to get it open, if not call a lock smith. I went in, they didn't have a way, I called a lock smith. We went back out the truck and stood there for over an hour waiting on some guy to come, work for 1 minute and charge me $35. Oh well, we were able to finally leave. Now, I'm back home, I talked to Eric, he definitely made me feel better, and it's still not the end of Sunday.

I bought a journal to keep for Eric when he left and I wrote in it almost everyday that he was gone. By the time he came home for R&R I had filled every page. It worked out to be only one page more than I needed, which I thought was kind of funny. When he left I bought another one to keep for the second half of our deployment journey. It's more than 3/4 of the way filled, I counted the pages, and it came to one page less then the VERY tentative date that we've been given of the time he'll be coming home. Kind of odd if you ask me.

I'm loading up the truck tomorrow for my drive this weekend to the oh-so-wonderful state of Kansas. I'm really excited about it though. I'm ready to get the rest of our things up there and start getting the place in order for when Eric comes home. I really just want to have a place for him to come and not have to worry about helping me unpack and get things in order. A place for him to relax and kick his feet up, with no worries. I love the thought that he'll be home very soon. I've come to realize that the term "very soon" changes once you go through a deployment. It's not that it's tomorrow or even a couple weeks from now, but when you get to a point where it's down to the lower double digits of days it's "very soon."

Our trip up to Kansas was a quick one, but we got to see Grandpa. The first day we were there he was sleeping the whole time, and wouldn't wake up. The second day he was up and they even had him out in the lobby area. He was giving kisses and he drank a couple glasses of water. He hadn't drank anything on his own in about a week, so that was really good. He's still refusing to eat though and yesterday he was irritable I guess. The hospice nurse told them yesterday that she didn't see any decline over the weekend, but no improvement either. Eric and I talked about sending a red cross message to him, but we decided it would be better if we just waited it out. They don't consider grandparents immediate family (which I think is ridiculous) and he might not have gotten it anyways. He just feels so bad because he's not here with me and he wants to be here to help. Of course it's definitely not his fault and he shouldn't feel like that, but I know it would seem a lot easier for the both of us if he was here.

I'm going up to Kansas this weekend with my sister to move the rest of my things up there. Then I have to bring my sister back down here and then go back up there and then I'll be there. That's so wonderful though. We will be one more step closer to Eric being home with me. My mom said she doesn't like that I'm going up there, but I have to get up there and get our place in order. I don't want Eric to come home to a house full of boxes. Not that it would bother him, but I'd just like to have the whole place in order, that way we don't have to worry about that when he first gets home. Besides, I need a major break from this house and my family. As blessed as I am to have them and to have been able to stay here for the time Eric's been gone, I NEED OUT! Hopefully between moving, school and unpacking it will help time go by quickly. As long as things with Grandpa don't get worse I'll be able to focus all my attention on those things. Am I the only one who thinks the month of August has stalled and will never come to an end? I suppose September and October will feel the same way though. I just can't wait until the day I wake up and it's time to go pick him up.

Blogger was messing up for a while, but I finally decided to try and republish the stupid thing and it worked, so that's good.

I've been doing ok this week as far as working out. I've been doing it like always, twice a day. I think I'm a bit addicted to Tae Bo. I love it. I went through all my clothes and had to get rid of most of them. It kind of sucked, but only because I had to get rid of so many things I had never even got a chance to wear because it was too small. Then they were too big, so they had to go. That's good, don't get me wrong, but I hate having to buy new clothes. I hate clothes shopping, lol. I told my mom today that I'm finally down to what I've had on my driver's license, lol. Well, as I'm sure you all can put two and two together, I was so much heavier then that number who in the world did I think I was foolin'? lol... Oh well, I was ashamed, and still am, about how much I let myself go. Now, though I'm quite proud of the way I feel. I have so much more energy now then I used to and I don't feel so self conscious. It's hard getting up the energy and strength to get started, but I am so thankful that the Lord gave me what I needed to get off my butt and do it. Of course I still have my hard days when I don't want to do anything, but I still do it, because I know more than anything that I don't want to go back to where I came from. It's a lifelong journey, but with the Lord's help I can do it.

I miss my husband. I miss the comfort that he gives me when I'm feeling down. I miss the way he always knows when something is wrong with me, even when I try to hide it. I miss the way he pesters me to tell him what's wrong when I don't want to. I miss the kisses and hugs and feeling so safe and secure in his arms. I miss everything about him and I just keep going through each day hoping that the next day go faster then this one did. They never do, but I guess that's to be expected. I'm looking forward to just being able to say, "I'll see you next month." I hope that day comes soon.

I'm going up to Kansas tomorrow morning to see my Grandpa. He's in the nursing home and they started him on Hospice today. I still don't know if the dr's have given any kind of estimation on how long he has, because that's a hard question to ask. My Aunt Dixie told my mom yesterday that Grandpa just keeps saying, "Lord have mercy." My dad said he heard him say that a few days ago, but didn't think anything of it. My mom asked what he thinks of it now and Dad said "I think he's ready to go." Dad had a very hard time when he lost his mom, and it's going to be so much worse on him with his dad. They have always been best buddies and Dad depends so much on Grandpa. I've been thinking about the times I have spent alone time with Grandpa and these two stories stick out greatest in my mind (sorry for the length): When I was 16, my brother moved to Nevada. Well, both of my aunt's lived there along with some of my cousins. When I was 17 my Grandpa wanted to drive out there and see them. Just him and I went. It was the first road trip I had been on, and I definitely wasn't an experienced highway driver (I'm from an extremly small town, and have parents that are really protective). So we were driving and we, for some reason I still don't understand, took the corner of Nebraska. Well, I'm driving through this little town, and I drive past a line of cops at the beginning of the town. I get past those cops and get on the highway (we were lost) and I come up on this cop and almost rear end him because he doesn't have his lights on. So, I swerve over real fast and go around him, and then get pulled over for not using my turn signal. Well, the cop doesn't give me a ticket and tries to explain how to get the heck out of that town. I was so nervous I switched and let Grandpa drive. I insisted that he not tell anybody about me getting pulled over, and he said alright. So, we try and follow the cops directions and end up at the beginning of the town again, where all the cops are. Grandpa drives really slow, always has, and one of the cops pulled him over. They said he was swerving and thought he might be a drunk driver, which is what they were all doing out there. So, he calls in the plates and the cop that had just pulled me over comes over the radio and says he just pulled us over and whatnot. Grandpa didn't get a ticket either, but we did get escorted out of town, lol. When we got to Nevada I told everyone. Grandpa said, "I thought we wasn't going to tell anybody." I said, "No, that was when I was the only one who had got pulled over, it's ok now that you did too." Grandpa said, "No, you're just a typical woman, you just wanted to be the one to tell them, so you told me not to." lol... He always cracks me up. Then another time I was driving him back up to Kansas and I passed a car and I noticed him gripping the arm rest, I said, "Grandpa, am I scaring you?" He said, "Oh, no. You're only going 80 uphill on the wrong side of the road." LOL..... Ok, I'm done with my useless stories of the night. Sorry I rambled.

Thank you to everyone for all your prayers. It's been such a blessing, and I'm so thankful to each and everyone of you girls.

The past couple days have been trying on our family. My aunts (my dad's sisters) came in from Montana and Nevada early Tuesday morning. They went over to the hospital at around 11 a.m. to see my grandpa (their dad). My mom and I went over about an hour later. He slept the whole time we were there, from noon until 2. We tried and tried, but he just wouldn't wake up. It was so sad to watch him, because he was twitching really bad while he was sleeping. My mom and I left, but my aunts stayed. They stayed there all day until about 10 that night. My mom and dad went back over there at about 6 and stayed till 9. He was up for a while during the evening with them there and they said he drank a little water and some Pepsi. They also got him to eat a little. The night nurse told them all that they didn't think he would walk out of the hospital he was so bad. He's severely dehydrated and putting him on an IV at this point would be like keeping him alive artificially. So, today my aunts got up and went over at about the same time. I jumped in the shower and my mom, dad and I were going to run over there. By the time I got out of the shower my aunts were back and packing up their stuff. They said the hospital released Grandpa and they were taking him back home to Kansas to the nursing home. They said that they told them at the hospital that he doesn't have long at all and they thought it would be better if he was around family and friends so they were releasing him. They didn't give it a time, but I know if he doesn't get some fluids in him it won't be too long. It is so sad how fast he has went downhill. Just last week he was running around the run (literally he was running, he loves to run) and now he can't even walk by himself. This guy has always been the strongest, most healthy, guy I have ever known. Just a couple years ago he got his physical and the Dr told him that he was in as good of shape as a 20 year old. Now, he's so bad that he can't feed himself? Where's the logic in that? What kind of end is that for a man who worked his butt off everyday until he was 75 years old? He's went from mostly independent to totally dependent in a matter of a couple of weeks?
He served in Korea, he worked on a ton of farms, he used to rodeo (he was still telling me those stories last week, saying he wanted to start doing it again, but they wouldn't let him because he was too old), he worked on oilrigs, in coal mines, in construction (up until he retired he was building roads), and this is what it boils down to? After writing that it helps me see that he's lived a full life and has had lots of fun in the process. In the past couple years he really started saying "I've had a lot of fun in my life" a lot. I know that God has His reasons, and that we don't always understand them. I'm just glad that Grandpa is in His hands, it's all up to Him now. There are two ironic things about this situation: 1. My sister is the exact same age as I was when my grandma passed away 7 years ago and 2. This is the second time that Eric's been gone when we've had a health issue in the family. The first time he was at PLDC and my dad got really sick with his liver. He was in liver failure and there was nothing the drs could do about it, and Eric couldn't come home then either. Now this one with Grandpa. He told me when I talked to him tonight to tell my family to stop it, lol. Maybe he shouldn't leave, lol. Man, I would love him to be here with me right now, that would be so nice to have the support he gives me. That's ok though, he'll be home in a couple months. God help our family pull through this, and if it's Grandpa's time let him go be at home with the love of his life, my Grandma Shirley.

Ok, a while back I found a website, The Tanker Brothers. They are a couple soldiers with a blog and a cause. It's a really neat website if you haven't ever heard of it. Anyways, their cause is to show the world that we support our troops. The anti-war people started a "Rolling Fast" to show that they are against the war. Well, The Tanker Brothers started their own fast, "Rolling Victory Fast", to show the world that we support our troops, no matter what political views you have.

So, I volunteered to show my support for the troops. Today was my day. Before I even got out of bed this morning I prayed that the Lord would give me the strength to do this with no problems. It hasn't been bad, at all. I haven't even been tempted to eat. Showing my support for my wonderful husband and the rest of the troops is worth it, that's for sure! After all they do for us, what's one day? Besides, there's nothing like the feeling of standing for something worthwhile.

Grandpa's doing better than the previous post. He's still in the hospital, but they're starting to try to get his medicine regulated. Hopefully he'll be a little back to normal pretty soon. At least so he's not out of it so much, because of the drugs they've had him sedated on, that he doesn't recognize anybody.

Another Gettin' Fit Friday is upon us. I did ok this week. It seemed like I ate a little more than usual, but it was more like smaller portions more times per day. Which is how Eric and my dad eat and they are both skinny, lol. Not that I'm like them, because if I were I wouldn't be worried about losing the weight. Anyways, I've done my workouts everyday. I've been doing more Tae Bo than usual since I'm getting bored with riding the stationary bike. That's alright though, I'm still doing it and that's what counts. I have lost a few more pounds which brings my grand total up to 60 pounds! I was pretty proud of myself when I looked at the scale.

Classes are going ok. Both Eric and I are working ahead in both classes. I took my first exam in military history today and made an 88%, which is good considering it is a history class. I also took a test in the finance class and made a 100%. So, anyways, that's going alright.

My grandpa's wife came down the other day. The first day that she was here was an alright day with Grandpa. However, the second day wasn't so good. He wasn't doing very well, and after she left he started crying. He was having a semi-breakdown I think. Anyways, my parents took him to the ER because he was really upset and for the most part he hadn't been doing good at all. He was up for 2 days at a time and kept getting really mad at my dad when he would tell him anything. I felt so bad for Grandpa the day they took him to the ER. It was right before his wife left and he had his arm around me and I said "You sure are handsome, Grandpa." He said, "I'm dumb." That broke my heart. I told him he was not, he was the smartest man I know. He smiled and said, "Did you know I love you?" Anyways, after taking him to the hospital, they decided to keep him. They said he was really dehydrated and they wanted to keep him in. That was on Wednesday. The dr told my parents that no matter how hard we try we can't give him the care that he needs and that when they release him from the hospital she wants him to go to a nursing home. They're keeping him in the hospital for 7-10 days to try and get his medicine regulated and such. He had an MRI done and they read it on Wednesday too. The dr said that it shows that the blood vessels in his head are almost non-existant and that his heart rate was only in the 50's. My mom's mom (my grandpa is my dad's dad) sent my mom some things on Alzheimer's and it said that the average length a person lives with the disease is 7 years, although some have lived with it for more than 20 years. Grandpa started getting symptoms right after my grandma passed away, 7 years ago. The dr that told my parents all that told them that basically the dr that said that Grandpa didn't have Alzheimer's was leading them down a path of false hope. I pray that this dr is wrong and that there will be a miracle happen.

I started classes yesterday. I'm taking American Military History and Personal Finance. Neither of them are sounding too interesting to me. I just figured that the personal finance one would help Eric and me when it comes to saving some money for our future. The history class I'm just taking because I need a history class to complete my degree. I'm not a big fan of history, but Eric took the class and said he loved it (of course he loves history, so that's not much help to me). Oh well, gotta do what ya gotta do. I'm just glad class finally started, hopefully it will help occupy my time.

Today has been a pretty crappy day. I just wasn't in a good mood at all. Everything was getting on my nerves. My sister was hounding me about wanting to go to Wal Mart. I was trying to read the stupid history book. My grandpa's wife is down here and we left only to return to find her car parked about two inches from where I park. That irritated me, but my mom said she'd move it. We left again, came back and nope, still in the same place. I told my mom, I really don't want the passenger side of my jeep ripped off. Ok, I know those are kind of stupid things to gripe about but it's just been one of those days. It's nothing really big, just everything was getting on my nerves. But Eric called and saved my day. He just started talking about this song on the Rascal Flatt's cd, "Ellsworth". It's a song about someone's grandma who has Alzheimer's and can't remember anything except when they bring up their grandpa. She remembers everything about their love from the time it started. It talks about them being high school sweethearts walking together and such. Anyways, he asked me if I thought we would have been high school sweethearts if we would have went to the same school. I told him yes I do. I said I think that even if we wouldn't have met when and where we did we would have eventually met each other. Because we were destined to be together. Anyways, after talking about that we started talking about when we were dating. We were saying how we started as friends and that's such a good way to start things. I told him that he never even asked me to be his girlfriend. I guess it was just unspoken, we both just knew. So, tonight while we were talking he asked me to go steady with him, lol. It sounds so corny, but it was so sweet. He told me that I could start wearing his Army ring if I wanted to, lol. By the time we got off the phone I was smiling from ear to ear. He always has that effect on me. His timing couldn't have been better, and I appreciate him so much for that. He always has a way of helping me forget about the stupid things in life and focus on what is important.

Ok, I almost forgot that today is Gettin' Fit Friday. So, it's midnight, but I remembered. I'm pretty proud of myself this week. I've done my exercising all week, except today. I did Tae Bo yesterday, which left me sore today, but I enjoyed it. Since I've been doing so good I rewarded myself this week. I went and got my hair cut. It's still basically the same, but I got 2 inches cut off. I love it though. It's the best it's looked in a long time. I went to a different lady, and I love the way she does it! Anyways, I didn't lose any more weight this week, but that's to be expected. However, I was able to go and buy a smaller size pants! Eric's been bugging me for a long time (along with all my family) to go buy new pants. The one's I have are so baggy it's really pathetic. I just hate going to buy new clothes when I'm not expecting to be in them for too long. I just bought several pairs of pants when Eric came home for R&R in May, and they are way to big. I hate having to get rid of them when they're only a couple months old. So, it's hard for me to want to go and buy new clothes. But, I did it anyways. It was nice to go into the fitting room and try on a size that I don't even remember wearing, EVER, and them fitting. I'm pretty darn proud of myself.

I went and visited my MIL today too. We had a pretty good conversation. She's big time into the crocheting, and it cracks me up. I mean, I do it sometimes, but she's like extremely dedicated to it. So, every time I go up there she shows me the blankets that she's accomplished since I last saw her. She's making blankets for Feed the Children. Since Jan. she's made 58 blankets. She's a character, but I love her.

Update on my grandpa:
His wife left yesterday. He's not been doing too good, but hopefully he'll be getting better. The dr scheduled him for a MRI for Monday. They want to make sure he doesn't have a tumor or anything like that. The dr also said that he can't say for sure how long it will be before we start to see an improvement in him. He said that it depends on how much damage was caused by the misdiagnosis and whatnot. He said it could be weeks, months or even years before he's fully recovered. We're praying for the best though. I just pray that with everyone going back to school and working that my dad is able to handle him the majority of the time by himself. If the good Lord is willing, it won't be too long though and he'll at least be mildy improved.

On a side note, my other grandpa (my mom's stepdad) had cancer back a couple years ago in his lungs. He went through cemo and radiation and went into remission. Well, a few months ago his arm started hurting him and he went to the PA that they have (they don't have a real dr) and he started treating him for a pulled muscle. Well, it hasn't gotten any better so he went to another PA and she was really worried about it. Turns out it's a tumor in his arm. So, he went and had a MRI done, but it was inconclusive. So please keep him in your prayers too. I would greatly appreciate it!

I still haven't got everything up to Kansas, but I'm not going to worry about it too much right now. Michelle asked if the military would move us. They won't because it was my choice to move down here while Eric's gone. It wasn't "approved" by them, so it's up to us to get back up there.

To end on happier news: We got the July newsletter for the unit and the girl who sent it said, "Only two more issues left." That is wonderful!!!!!

Yesterday and today have been nothing but painting. My mom got on her hands and knees and scrubbed and waxed her kitchen floor. It looked really good, so she said would like to paint her kitchen, so my sister decided to buy her the paint for her birthday. So, we've been spending the past couple days just painting. It wasn't too big a deal, except the shutters for the window. They are a huge pain the butt! Every time it seemed like we had got them painted there were more stupid areas of the stupid things that we missed. We now have a new family motto, "Don't clean the floor if you don't want to paint", lol. Oh well, mom likes it, so it was worth it.

Well, since my parents took my grandpa to the dr he's just been getting worse. The dr said that he didn't have alzheimer's and took him off one of his alzheimer's medications plus he lowered the insulin for his diabetes. He also put him on 4 more medications. Well, he's just been getting worse and worse since then. His wife is a piece of work too. She's so selfish and it just makes me so mad. The whole situation is not about her, it's about Grandpa. For pete's sake, she's in her 70's you'd think she'd realize the world doesn't revolve around her by now. Anyways, after fighting with her and finally letting her know that there is absolutely NO way that we're willing to put him in a nursing home at this point, she's agreed to let him move in with my parents. We all still have hope that he's going to get better. We just want her to give us a chance to help him. If that doesn't work then at least we tried. You would think she would be grateful that his family wanted to help her out. Nope, she acts like we're all out to get her. IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU LADY!!! So, Grandpa is coming down here tomorrow to live with us. She's coming too. So, we're all trying to figure out places to be, where she won't be, lol... She's staying until Friday! Oh boy.

I know it's not the right attitude to have, but she just chaps my hide. Grandpa has always been the type of man who would give you the shirt off his back (he offers every time you compliment his shirt, lol). We just want someone who is willing to put his needs first. I know she can't handle him the way he is, so let us try. Without being a big fat baby! Ok, thanks for letting me get that out of my system.

Please pray that I can find a way to get the rest of my things from here up to our new apartment. I hate to ask my brother again, he works on an oilrig and he's fixing to start school, and I don't know anybody else who would be able to help me. I have to get two vehicles plus the furniture from down here up there. I know that the Lord will show me the way. I just have to give it to him, but sometimes that is truly one of the hardest things to do.

Alright, well I'm rested up now, so I thought I would write about my visit with my family. The first night we got there was alright. All of the kids (minus the two under 10) stayed in one of the cabins and stayed up really really late talking. We even played truth or dare. That was quite odd, especially since we were all cousins, lol. Nothing too personal revealled. Although they were pretty mean to my cousin who's 12. They made him eat the head of a locust, lol. But, don't worry, before it was all over we made the cousin (Skyler) who made him eat that eat the body of the locust. I felt like we were on fear factor, lol.


Anyways, after having to reveal a few things that I would have rather not had my little 15 year old sister hear, we went to sleep. It wasn't anything too terrible, it's just that I'm really protective of her. I don't think that she needs to even be thinking about things like drinking and partying. She's only 15! So, the next day the only thing I could think about was Eric. I wanted him to be there so bad. My cousin from Washington, Amanda, was there. I hadn't seen her in 5 years, and it was great seeing her. She brought her boyfriend, Brian, though. So, we weren't able to catch up too much. Brian was halarious though. So, the third day was better. We all went swimming and played horseshoes (I suck by the way). Then we loaded up in my cousin Victor's truck and went into town. It was a good time. Amanda, Victor, and I have always been really close. They are my favorite cousins. It's kind of sad though. Victor only lives an hour and a half away from my parents, but it's been almost 2 years since I've seen him. That's really pathetic. The last night that we were there, we spent it at Victor's house. Anyways, I had a good time, but I was really ready to leave. Amanda kept asking me to call and reschedule my appointment to move into the apartment, but I didn't. I was so ready to get up there and start moving in. I know that I should have probably stayed there, but I was just ready to get into our place. One of these days, though, I would love to be stationed in Washington. Then I could spend a lot more time with her. Here's a couple pictures of our time at the lake.

Amanda, me and Victor















Me and Victor




My sister and Skyler--I couldn't resist, that's too cute!


Amanda and Brian


My Grandma, she's so cute!


I'm watching "Down to You" with Freddie Prince Jr. and Julia Stiles. I love that movie. It's the first one that Eric and I ever watched together. Aahh, such sweet memories.

Well, I'm back, and just in time for Gettin' Fit Friday! Well, I didn't exercise in the traditional sense of the word. I basically just got my exercise in by doing things with my family, like swimming and walking around. I also did a lot of moving this week. I spent three days just moving things out of storage and unpacking. I was feeling horrible because I hadn't been able to do my usual routine. Especially today while I was driving back to my parents house. I was feeling really bad about it. When I got home I weighed myself, with a fear of having gained weight over the week. To my surprise, I lost 3 pounds! YAY!!! That was wonderful to see that.

Me with my new outfit today. Which, by the way, the pants are still too big for me, lol.


Here are a couple pictures of our new apartment. It's so cute. I went and ordered a new bed for us too. It's so comfortable! Oh my gosh, that was the best night's sleep that I've had since Eric left. I just melted into the mattress. I can't wait until he's here to enjoy it with me. I hate moving though. I've done a million loads of laundry and dishes. There's still a ton more to go! It seems like I unpacked a ton of boxes, but yet, look at the stack that's still left for me! Geez! Oh well, I'm excited about it. We're one step closer to Eric coming home, and that's what makes it all worth while. In fact, Eric sent a few boxes home the other day. They're on their way! Which makes us another step closer. So, we're two steps closer to him coming home. WooHoo, I can count! LOL...ok, I'm tired. I'll post more about my time with my family later. I'm too tired to mess with loading more pictures on here tonight. Goodnight.

Well, Charla had the idea for "Gettin' Fit Friday's" and I think that is an excellent idea. I, too, have struggled with my weight for most of my life. I believe that I started gaining weight when I was around 10 or 11. Ever since then it's been a big factor in my life. I've always hated my weight, but I definitely am not coordinated in any way, shape or form. So, I didn't play sports. My brother was a big athlete, he played baseball and football. He just couldn't understand why I couldn't (or wouldn't) play sports and be active in that way. It wasn't for me, at all. It still isn't. I can't catch or throw to save my life. When I was a Senior in high school, I joined weight lifting as an elective, and I slimed down a little, but after that was over, I went back to doing pretty much nothing. Then I got married and I really stacked the weight on. I'm really ashamed at what I let the scale get up to, and when I'm down to my final goal weight, I'll tell everyone what it was. So, when Eric left to go overseas, I decided to do something about my problem. It is, after all, my problem. Nobody can take care of it for me, that's for sure! I pray a lot that the Lord gives me the strength that I need to continue to do what I have to do to get where I need to be with my weight. Anyways, when Eric left I just decided to do what I have to do to be healthy for myself and him and our future babies. That's one of the main reasons that I decided I had to do something. We've tried since we got married (almost 4 years ago) to have a baby, with no luck. I know that it will come in the Lord's timing, but I'm sure that my weight isn't helping matters either. I have to do my part for God to do His. So, I've lost 51 pounds since last November. I've given up pop. I haven't had one in about 7 months. I also don't eat sweets. I exercise twice a day too. I started out walking on the treadmill, and going for 2 miles. Now I ride a stationary bike for 30 mins, twice a day. Then about every other day I do Tae Bo. I love Tae Bo. I think it helps me a lot because Billy Blanks is a Christian, and he's very encouraging on his tapes. I've been doing "Billy's Bootcamp", it's tough, but if you just do what you can, you will eventually work your way up to being able to do the whole tape. Oh, and I also drink a ton of water everyday.

Thank you Charla for getting this started. I know that I would love to be able to find new ideas on how to keep up with my exercising. It's difficult at times to keep up the motivation and keep going.

I'll be gone for a while. I'm going tomorrow to see my cousins and uncle that are in from Washington. Then, when I leave there, I'm going up to Kansas to move into our new apartment!!!! I am so happy to say that. I've had my Jeep loaded up since Tuesday, just sitting there waiting to go and unpack it at OUR OWN PLACE!!!! I need to get away and this is a big answer to my prayers. I can't wait until Eric's home too. Just him and me alone, in our own place. Aaahhh, that's music to my ears.

My sister and mom decided it would be funny to play a joke on my brother and me yesterday. Meagan (my sister) is 15, she'll be 16 in Sept. I'm 7 years older and my brother is 9 years older than she is, so we are super protective over her. Well we were all sitting and eating dinner last night and my mom says, "So what time will he be over?" Meagan says, "Oh about 7." I was wondering what they were talking about and I asked but they wouldn't tell me who was coming over. So, mom asks her what time the movie starts. She says 9:30. I started freaking out. They were talking about a boy that she has a crush on and her going on a date with him. Matt (my brother) got so mad, he can go from zero to pissed in about 2 seconds. So, after griping at my parents for letting her go to on a date at 15, he got up and threw his food in the trash. Well, while he was in the kitchen they told me they were just kidding with him. Matt comes back in and grabs his keys off the table. He was so mad at this time, he was red from anger. He tells me to hand him his wallet, he was leaving. I told Meagan she better tell him she was just kidding because he was ticked off. They told him they were just kidding, he didn't think it was funny at all, but he didn't leave. I asked him where he was going to go, he said he was going to go find out where that kid lived! LOL Ok, my brother is not a small guy, by no means, and he's very protective of his sisters and I know for sure that he was seriously going to find the kid. I would definitely be afraid if I was any guy that ever comes around her! (The picture is of my brother & sister)

Well, today I was talking to my dad and he said that he couldn't believe that Matt thought he would go along with letting Meagan go on a date, before she was 16, with some kid he didn't know. He said he's going to have a heart attack when it comes time to let her start dating, just like he about did when it came time for me. He said that I did good though, except for one guy I brought home. LOL... Let's just say this guy was not their cup of tea. I think he was part of my "rebellious stage". Thinking back I honestly think I was just trying to get a reaction from them with the guy. I told him "yeah, but you love Eric." He said, "Yeah, I do. I think I fell for him faster than you did." I'm not sure about that but they certainly did hit it off fast!

I love my husband, and I am so thrilled that we have the families we do. His mom drives me crazy but I know she loves me, and that's all that matters. She raised a terrific son, and I am forever grateful for that. He's a believer in God, such a hard worker, always true to his word, loving, kind, generous, faithful and trusting. I could go on forever about what a wonderful man he is, but I'm sure it would bore everyone except me, lol. I love him with every ounce of my being. I thank God for him every single day and I thank God that He gave Eric a mom that raised him to be all of those things.

(Ok, sorry, I rambled so long, lol.)

Yesterday was a horrible day for me. I was so bummed, I spent half the day just crying. I hadn't heard from the apartment I applied for and it was stressing me out. I was missing Eric like crazy, and I couldn't get over the fact that we still have 3-4 months left. Hasn't he been gone for an eternity already? Well after we talked last night I felt better. I know I can do this, and I will, but I certainly don't want to. Oh well, I know he doesn't want to be over there just as much as I don't want him there. About the only thing we can do though is do it and pray. Prayer is a big part of my life, and I'm so thankful for that. So, after lots of prayers, I woke up today feeling much better. I called about the apartment that I put the application in at. I decided that it wasn't worth losing my sanity over and waiting for an answer. After a couple minutes of the lady looking up the status of my application I found out that we were completely approved. She said that the only thing that we have to do is wait until the first, switch over all the bills to our name and schedule a move-in inspection date. YAY!!! Talk about a big weight off my shoulders. God definitely answered Eric's and my prayers (is that good English? Oh wait, I'm from OK, it doesn't matter!).

Also, when I thought we were going to rent the house I paid the guy $600 for the first month's rent. Well, he told me at the time that he wouldn't hold me to anything until I signed the lease, he was supposed to send it to me. So, I mailed the keys back to the guy, and told him to send my check back to me. I still haven't received it. I called him today too. I asked him if he had gotten my letter and he said yes. I asked him if he had sent my check back, he said no. He said that they cashed the check the day I gave it to him, but he would send me my money back. However, he told me that he was going to deduct about 5 days worth of rent because I cost him about a week's worth of rent money. I said, well you told me I could get out if I wanted. He said, "I did?" I said "yes, you said you wouldn't hold me to anything until I signed the lease." So he agreed to send me back my money.

My parents and uncle took my grandpa to a neurologist on Wednesday. They told him they wanted to completely start from scratch. The doctor automatically adjusted most of his medications. The Dr said that he doesn't think he has Alzheimer's, he thinks it's his diabetes that's the problem. He said that his blood vessels are getting clogged so it's making it to where he's not getting enough blood to his brain. So he gave him medicine to open them up. That was such awesome news. Of course he still has to run some tests and do some more adjusting of the medicine's, but he said that Grandpa should get almost 100% better. He just doesn't know how long it will take. He said it could takes months, but we'll take that over knowing that over the months he's going to just get worse.

Ok, so I think I may be a little flighty or maybe it would be called indecisive, but that's ok, right? Well, after talking to Eric about the house that we were looking at we decided not to rent it after all. I don't think I would be comfortable staying that far out of town, away from everybody, all by myself. I figured that even if I stayed in Oklahoma until he comes home I'll eventually be there by myself. I mean he'll have to pull 24 hr duties and maybe go to the field and such, there's not getting around it. I hadn't signed a lease yet, the guy was supposed to mail it to me, so I just let him know we wouldn't be taking it after all. So the weekend was all about going to find something we COULD live in, where I could be comfortable staying alone. You would not believe how tough it is getting to find a place up there. Geez, I called 17 different apartment complexes and they were all filled!! So, thankfully I had an appointment to see an apartment up there. I loved it! It was so wonderful. I felt really really good about this place. I filled out an application so I'm praying that everything goes good and we're able to get it. She said it would take a few days to get it processed so I should know by the end of the week. I went ahead and signed the lease and paid the deposit so if we get approved we will be the one's to get it. I am definitely praying about it!

My husband is the sweetest man to me! I love him so very much. He told me about a week ago that he had ordered me something, but he wouldn't tell me what it was. I was very surprised too, he's usually really terrible about being able to keep secrets (that's not a bad thing, lol). This time though, he kept it. Well, it arrived today and I was so surprised to open my package. He's the most thoughtful man in the world. It even came with a message for me from him, "I love you with all my heart and soul. Thank you for being so wonderful. I love you!!" I love him so very much! It's not for anything special, just because he wanted to get me something. What a present!

Eric hasn't heard anything about his NCOER yet. He said that it would take a while for the guy to get it done.

I lost the ring that Eric gave me for our anniversary one year. When I realized it was gone I was in the shower and I searched everywhere in the bathroom (and I mean everywhere!). Then I came out and had my mom and dad searching too. I finally found it in the room I'm staying in. Thank God! My fingers are getting smaller and it's getting harder for me to keep them on, lol. I don't want to get them re-sized until Eric comes home though, because I don't want to take them off while he's gone. I guess I'll just have to keep a very close eye on them from now on.

My cousins and uncle are coming in from Washington at the end of the month. It's going to be nice to see my girl cousin, I haven't seen her in about 4 years. We keep in touch by email every once in a while, but we're both real busy so it's hard to stay in contact. We didn't grow up around each other, but every time they would come down we would be inseparable. She's such an awesome person. We have definitely been blessed with such a wonderful family. Almost every one of us cousins are like best friends. Although the past few years we've grown apart, which is to be expected, it's always nice to sit and talk and catch up on "the good ol' days". Geez, I feel old!

Eric's getting his NCOER done today. I'm really excited to hear what the NCOIC has to say about the job he's doing. It's his first one since becoming an NCO and I'm so proud of him.

Every single day I fall more in love with my husband. He's so wonderful to me and I can't thank him enough for the love that he gives me. Please be careful Eric, I'm praying for you!

My sister and I made the long trip up to Kansas yesterday. I'm so tired right now, but we made it back safely. The trip went well. I talked to Eric yesterday before we left, and we got out of here at about 10 yesterday morning. We made it up there at about 5:30 p.m., and checked into the motel. My sister truly is a blonde. We were driving down the road and she says, "Are we staying at a hotel?" I said, "No, we're staying at Motel 6." She says, "Yeah, but isn't Motel 6 a hotel?" She was as serious as could be too. I said, "Meagan, it's called MOTEL 6!" She cracks me up.

Anyways, we went by the house yesterday to make sure I could find it. I didn't know the actual address, just how to get there, so I hoped that the house I came across was the right one. Then we went back to the motel (not hotel) . Then this morning we went to the mall, my sister is a huge shopping fan (me, not so much). We stayed there until it was time for my appt. When we got out to the house (the one I found the night before was the right one) the guy was mowing the yard. Well, it only took about 20 mins of talking to the guy and looking around and I made my decision. I wanted more than anything to be able to talk to Eric and make a decision with him. It's hard to make those kinds of decisions without him, but I did. It's out in the country, but I factored in the drive for Eric to work. In fact, last night I clocked it to see how long it would take him to get there. It's only a couple miles more to drive from this house to work then it was from our apartment in town. If you look at the fact that there shouldn't be as much traffic from this house, it'll probably be a shorter drive. That's a good thing. The other good things are that it's just so cute. It's really big for the price, a lot bigger than our apartment, and $30 less a month. It has everything we wanted, it has a washer/dryer hookup and he'll allow pets. The downside is that it's pretty much in the boondocks, so I'm not so sure about staying out there too much by myself until Eric's back. It's also right next to a cornfield, lol. But, in the end...I got the house! It's so adorable! That's one thing I can cross off my list of things to do. (Also, if this doesn't make any sense, please forgive me, I'm really tired!)